The Rapids

Sometimes life is slow like a gently flowing stream. Then out of nowhere, the stream turns into a mighty river with class five rapids. I've been white-water rafting, and OH MY is it fun. But scary. But fun. And exhausting. The hardest parts as the nonprofessional is not knowing when the rapids are going to give you a break and trusting that your guide knows what he's doing. So you sit back, row when he says row, stop when he says stop and just enjoy each crazy moment. And sometimes you scream at the top of your lungs out of equal parts fear and excitement.

That's where we are. In the middle of the rapids. We've spent two and half years in the gently flowing river as we have waited for God's direction with P's job. Then all of a sudden, there was an interview and an offer. The rafting ride started getting a little more exciting.

He starts on Tuesday. And if all goes well the first month or two, he's willing to commit to being there for a few years. Then the next change... new car. He'll be in sales and out on his route all day, so sharing a car is no longer feasible. Then the next change... a new house. One with three bedrooms because we can't fit more kids in a two bedroom. Which brings us to the next change... the adoption process starts again. This time, we'll jump in full-force. I've been patiently looking forward to this process for the past year, and I am so excited for it to start. But whoa is it an overwhelming process. Hours of paperwork, agencies to select, countries to narrow down, more paperwork, classes, books, waiting and more waiting. That's just the beginning. Then we dive into life as the parents of four kids.

Looking at all of these changes is...well...overwhelming. Super exciting but amazingly overwhelming. Luckily, even though I can't see the next rapid, I trust that our Guide knows what's coming. And He's capable of leading us through the rapids. So, we go when He says go. We stop when He says stop. And we try our best to enjoy every crazy moment. And sometimes we'll scream out of equal parts fear and excitement.

I can't believe how long it's been since I posted. I have to admit I am in survival mode right now. The boys aren't sleeping, and the time change sure didn't help. C and I have been up since 5 am... which feels like 4 am our body time. Ugh! It's hard to function with so little sleep, so just the basics are getting done... and those are barely getting done.

On top of that, I have committed to too many things. Not bad things, and not huge things, but each small commitment takes an hour or so a week. Those hours add up when I only have one quiet hour during the day. Plus the lack of sleep is causing A to be extremely needy. He's pretty needy anyway, but this is just kicking his neediness up to a whole new level. I can't be out of the room for 30 seconds before I'm being paged. He's a little shadow following me around and asking questions that he knows the answer to just to hear his own voice. So draining.

In the midst of all of this, I'm praying for the right perspective. I know that the day will come not too long from now that A will choose his friends over me and my opinion won't be on his priority list. So I'm trying to cherish these days. Trying.

A sweet friend reminded me the other day that everyone has bad weeks at work. It's the same for stay-at-home moms. Some weeks are just harder than others. But this too shall pass.

So there you have it... a quick post while the boys finish up their pbj's. I have so much more to blog about, but that's it for now. And I fully intend to nap this afternoon so the blog will have to wait for another day.

A Joyful Noise

I love my kids. I know... I'm a mom. That's my job. But, it's true.

We were in the car yesterday and I turned the radio on. C immediately told me to turn it off because he didn't like "the people singing at him." So, we decided to sing instead. I couldn't help but laugh out loud as I envisioned the scene in heaven as all three of us belted out "Our God is Greater" by Chris Tomlin. The sweet little 2-year-old and 4-year-old voices in the back were LOUD and not exactly hitting the right notes, but I know that God was smiling down on them like a proud Papa. They were praising Him with every ounce of their beings, and it was precious to witness. In Psalm 100, God calls us to "Make a joyful noise unto the Lord." That was definitely what was going on in the car. Pure, unadulterated, no-holds-barred praise.

Misconceptions

A is such a smart kid, that sometimes I forget he's only three (almost 4). Today, though, he made a few comments that made me smile and remember that even though there is so much he understands, he still has a looooong way to go.

1- We went to the zoo today, and they were putting up solar panels. Of course, Mr. Nosy had to know what the construction was all about. I tried to explain how the panels take the energy from the sun and turn it into electricity. He got a very sad look on his face and said, "Oh... I guess that's why the sun isn't shining very much anymore. They are taking all of the energy from the sun."

2-On our way home from the zoo, he all of a sudden got super excited as though he just had the world's best idea. He said, "Mom, someday when I grow up, I want to be a penguin."

3- Later, we were playing Chutes and Ladders... his FAVORITE game. He picked out the playing pieces for each of us because "they matched." I was a little confused because one was an Asian-looking girl and the other was a boy with brown skin. So, I asked, "You want our pieces to match? Do these two really match?" He looked at me shaking his head and practically rolling his eyes and said, "Mooomm. They both have pointy shoes. See?"

Progress

I have claimed for years that A is the pickiest eater on the planet, but I feel like over the last few weeks, maybe he is giving up claim to this title, at least a little. The past two days alone, he has eaten:

Melon
Pears
Apple
Carrots (cooked)
Carrots (raw) dipped in hummus (he actually REQUESTED this for a snack!!)
Shredded bbq pork sandwich
Braised short ribs! He had to dip it in ketchup, but he ate every single bite without complaint!!

I know this may not seem monumental to anyone else, but we are talking about the kid that lived off of dairy and carbs for three and a half straight years. He's been telling me since December that once he turns 4, he'll try more foods! I guess since we are less than two weeks away from the big birthday, he is ready to try. Hooray! Makes for more enjoyable meals with less stress, less fighting and fewer tears.

I know it's been awhile since I've updated, but I can't really think of anything super funny or exciting to share. Don't get me wrong... life is good. Just a little ordinary. Not blog-worthy. Here are a few updates:

-Both boys slept in until 7 this morning! I was tired yesterday, so I went to bed early which means I got a GREAT night's sleep! Everyone has a better day when momma is well-rested.

- This was the first sleep-in day in awhile. For some reason, we are back into the routine of 5 am wake ups! Ugh. It was hard enough when I didn't know any different, but after the boys slept in for two weeks straight, I thought we were finally over the bump. No luck.

-C had his first no-nap day today. We put him down at the normal time. He had been acting a little grumpy. Thought he would be out like a light. No dice. He laid in his crib reading books for the entire duration of A's quiet time. When the timer beeped, C was still wide awake and ready to get out. Oh, I am not ready for this step. If it means he'll sleep through the night, I guess it's okay, but I got an entire extra year of naps out of A. I'm hoping it was just a fluke day.

-The weather was beautiful this weekend! Yesterday we walked to a neighborhood park. I was AMAZED that we were the only ones there. It was practically a spring day... or at least it felt that way. I know it was only 37, but it felt much warmer. Today we ventured out to a park after our failed nap attempt. This time, the park was packed. Just how it should be on the first nice weekend in months. Although it was warm compared to the winter weather we are used to, I was a little surprised to see a few kids in shorts and a couple of girls in tank tops!

-I've been reading a lot lately. Shepherding a Child's Heart (it got off to a good start, but in the end i didn't like it but would love to decompress with anyone who has read it before), Forgotten God (just started but I'm liking it so far), The Shack (liked this one. i know it caused some big debates and it isn't completely Biblically accurate, but it sure did challenge my stereotypes of God).

Winter Days

The new rule in the house is that C's paci is only allowed in his crib. Not being one to give in easily, his new favorite activity is sitting in his crib alone reading books. It's pretty adorable. He'll stay in there for a long time... 30- 45 min...by himself... just flipping through books! Anything to have some precious paci time!

Our kids traded sicknesses off and on for two straight weeks. It was a LONG time to be house-bound. We busted out some new art supplies, which was fun. C has finally reached the stage where he won't just stick the paint in his mouth, so he got to join in. Oh my does that boy love art! He asks every day in his cute little 2-year old voice to do a "pwo-jet" (project).

On one of our sick days, we drew some roads and a construction site on large art paper. The boys pushed trucks and scooped up "dirt" (aka Smarties) for nearly an hour. They had so much fun and were adorable playing together. They can be such good, kind friends to each other, and when that happens, it is just precious to watch.

I know this one is random, but I just wanted to point out how well we eat. How delicious was this meal?!? Homemade pesto with chicken raised on our friend's farm served atop homemade whole wheat pasta. Yum! Does it get any better?